Monday, August 22, 2016

I'm So Over Grown-Up Bullies


Bullying happens when you're younger, both on a smaller scale (such as teasing) and a larger scale (such as stealing lunch money or beating someone up.)  One thing you pretty much count on, though, is that once you're all grown up that stuff won't happen anymore.  Kids bully because they lack self esteem, lack discipline, lack a solid family environment, or any other number of reasons.  In some cases, kids behave badly because they just haven't learned that the behaviors aren't appropriate. 

As a grown adult, I assume that people are past being influenced by their childhood, and that they have learned which behaviors are appropriate and which are not.  Things like "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all"; "always use your manners"; "don't hurt people's feelings"; "respect others, especially your elders"; and "you'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar" were all a part of my day-to-day upbringing.  As an adult who graduated college, has held jobs, is involved with a variety of community, professional, and social organizations, and who now owns a business, I still use those lessons in my every day life. 

So I am thoroughly and completely shocked at how many adults I deal with that are basically "bullies". They are rude, selfish, disrespectful, and generally damage the mojo of the groups they are associated with.  People tiptoe around them because it's just easier than getting them all fired up.  Sometimes they are in positions that we don't have anyone else to fill, so we dance around them for that reason.  It's a little ridiculous if you think about it.

So - it's not January...it's August, so this is not a New Year's Resolution. A few things have occurred in the past few weeks with a few of these "grown-up bullies" that put me over the edge.  So, from now on I resolve NOT to put up with their crap anymore.  No one is irreplaceable in a position.  And I don't care who you are, nothing gives you the right to talk down to someone, belittle them, insult them, or be rude and disrespectful to them.  I'm sorry if your parents didn't raise you right, but you're an adult now, and you are fully capable of Googling "MANNERS."  

Until someone steps up to these grown up bullies then they have no reason and no motivation to change their behaviors.  I can't control these people, but I CAN control how I respond to them, and how much power I let them have.  I am in the driver's seat, and it's time for the grown-up bullies to get OFF MY BUS. 


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