Like A Train Wreck, You Just Can't Look Away

OK - I have to derail from my dreams of being a travel agent to fill you in on a sad diversion I embraked on last night. It's called "Celebrity Fit Club" and it's on VH1.

I have never seen this show before, but a friend's Facebook post piqued my interest. Specifically, he wrote; "Bobby Brown, Nicole Eggert, and K Fed on Celebrity Fit Club. DVR don't fail me now." Well, that sounded entertaining enough, and Bart is away in the snowy white north, so I figured what the hell.

I then spent an hour watching fat ex-celebrities vomit. OK - so not ALL of them vomited. But there were two distinct vomit moments in the first 15 minutes. Hell - who doesn't find THAT entertaining!

Here's the run down: 8 "B" list (maybe "C" list) celebrities do a 9 week boot camp with the drill instructor from hell. On the slate this time around: K Fed, his ex Shar Jackson (which is fun in and of itself, since apparently they hate each other, and neither one of them realized the other was going to be on the show.) Bobby Brown (yes - the former rap/pop star); Nicole Eggert from Baywatch and Charles in Charge (who is not fat enough to be on this show); some reality show chick that I have never heard of (but she's way fat and was the first to puke); Sebastian Bach (lead singer of Skid Row); The fat girl from High School Musical; and some guy who won some fashion reality show.

All of them are pretty tubby except for Eggert. Who should be slapped for being on the show and being unhappy with her 134 pounds. Bitch.

Anyway, it was hilarious. On the first night, they put all this food out. Bobby Brown ate fried chicken and beer, bless his heart. Sebastian Bach was the 2nd person to vomit. They had the drummer from Def Leppard on to inspire them. K Fed had to dig holes for stumps as punishment for quitting. Fun fun fun!

My three favorite quotes of the night?

#1. The celebs were complaining about the clothes they had to wear, and the barracks they were sleeping in. Bobby Brown said matter-of-factly; "It's better than jail."
#2. When they asked Sebastian Bach why he was there, he replied: "No one likes a fat rock star."
#3. When the nutritionist doctor cam into the mess hall, the big reality chick said "Jean Claude Van DAMME he is fine!" I laughed out loud at that one.

I can't wait till next week. Who's going to vomit next? Are the girls all going to beat Nicole Eggert senseless? Is someone finally going to explain why the hell all these women find K Fed so attractive? Will Shar have K Fed killed in his sleep?

See what I men? Train Wreck.

(Comes on Monday nights, by the way...) ;)